I knew the name of this painting months before it was finished. Sometimes they come like that, fully formed, the idea that the painting has to chase. I started painting it during the summer and finished it months later, five minutes before it was photographed. I took my time. I let it rest for weeks at a time, looking and thinking.
This painting is autobiographical without being a portrait. All the feelings, the messy mass of emotions, thoughts, struggles, frustrations – the trying…the breaking through..the transformation.
I started the painting with a painting roller, inspired by painting my studio wall. Some of those initial roller marks can still be seen on the top left of the painting under the pink layer. I recorded a series of videos about the painting process: watch Video 1 on YouTube or Instagram; Video 2 on YouTube or Instagram; Video 3 on YouTube or Instagram.
